I don't mean the adrenaline rush that would come with skydiving or the fear that accompanies seeing a mouse in the house. I mean the terror that is brought about by the threat of evil.
I live on a half mile dirt road. We are the only house on the road and traffic is sparse.
A couple of weeks ago, on a Tuesday evening, I was home by myself. The sun was beginning to set and I was lazily dozing on the couch. But when dogs started barking their "intruder bark," I quickly perked up. I looked out the living room window, and I saw a white truck stopped on the road, facing my house, about twenty yards away. Two guys got out of the cab and one hopped off the truck bed. They were carrying guns, yelling words I couldn't understand, and sauntering towards my house.
My heart lept in my chest and my mind raced with uncertainty. As I ran to the kitchen to get my phone and lock the door, I looked out the window that faces the opposite direction. I stopped cold. There was another white truck stopped on the road, mirroring the first truck. Four guys emerged from the crew cab. Two carried guns and all four were hollering at the sky with words that I could not comprehend.
My dogs continued to bark ferociously. I could think of no other scenario besides the obvious: they were closing in on me. My legs began to tremble and scenes from action movies unfolded in my mind.
Before I could think to call for help, I saw three beagle dogs with hunter orange vests run up to the crew cab. The men grabbed the dogs, hoisted them into the bed of the truck, and tore down the road. They left only a cloud of dust and me, a pile of nerves on the floor. I went outside to attempt to calm my dogs but accomplished little with my legs still shaking.
Fear, in my plush American life, does not tread much further than hunters tracking down their wayward dogs.
But lately, it's apparent that violence is real and even threats of violence invoke widespread fear. Bombs in Boston and a threat to kill children in our local schools, filled the news this week.
I recently finished reading The Devil in Pew Number Seven by Rebecca Nichols Alonzo, an autobiography in which Rebecca describes the terror that her family endured. She was just a young child in the 1970s, when her father became the minister at the Free Welcome Holiness Church in North Carolina. The community quickly came to adore her father and her family. However, one member of the community felt the Nichols family was trespassing on his territory and infringing upon his influence in the town and the church. This man took it upon himself to terrorize the family, vowing that they would leave the town "crawling or walking, dead or alive." Through multiple bombings, sniper shots, and threats, the family felt God's calling to stay and stand strong.
The book was written a couple of years ago and attention was drawn to the story when Rebecca and her brother appeared on The Dr. Phil Show in 2011. So I'm a little behind the times on this one, but I think the story is perhaps even more relevant today. Ya see, the author describes in detail how her family weathered the terror. They clung to Jesus' words, prayed together frequently, and drew strength from other believers.
In this country, we are becoming increasingly familiar with terror. It used to be so foreign to us. So we struggle to cope with our fears and we struggle to reconcile our faith with the emotions that accompany the current events that fill the news. This book portrays a model of how to bear those struggles and fears.
I won't reveal the ending; however, I will say that this book also models how to cope when it appears that the terror (the devil) has won. When God not only allows, but perhaps even blesses us with suffering.
Have we forgotten Matthew 5:11-12?
Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
Or 2 Timothy 3:12?
In fact, everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted
The author's story is remarkable. But near the end of the book, the author shares what is equally profound: forgiveness. This book reveals the path to forgiveness when untold harm is done. It's not a sermon with five steps that all begin with the same letter. It's not a theologian who has all the right answers. She is a real person who has experienced real suffering, and she is allowing others to peek into her life, her thoughts, and her journey of forgiveness.
You and I cannot walk away from what has been done to us. At the same time, as crazy as it sounds, we're commanded to speak the language of heaven, to forgive as we have been forgiven--generously, fully, and freely. That means we forgive with no strings attached; that may require us to forgive repeatedly. When we do, we shock the world with God's power at work within us. When they shake their heads in wonderment, when they struggle to understand how anyone could forgive like that, we have the opportunity to point them to the Cross, the ultimate act of forgiveness. (pg 198)
Regardless of the circumstances, may we learn from those who have endured and speak the language of heaven.
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